Chapter 15 - Claire’s Anger
I spent first year furious.
Not dramatic every day.
Quiet.
At Daniel.
Family.
Myself.
Why did I let Vanessa control so much?
Why didn’t I ask trust questions?
Why did I laugh when she called Lily spoiled?
Why did I let “that’s just Vanessa” become explanation?
Therapist asked:
“Did you know she was stealing?”
“No.”
“Did you know she would hit Lily?”
“No.”
“Did you know Daniel was signing trust papers carelessly?”
“No.”
“Then what exactly are you prosecuting yourself for?”
“Not noticing.”
“Noticing what?”
I hated therapy.
We worked.
I learned hindsight creates fake certainty.
Signals existed.
But not all signals point to disaster.
Vanessa critical.
Common.
Family trust vague.
Common in wealthy families.
Daniel avoidant.
Marriage issue.
Not prediction of fraud.
I could learn without pretending I should have known everything.
That freed energy for Lily.
She started play therapy.
Birthday themes bothered her.
For eighth birthday she wanted no cake.
Cupcakes.
Fine.
No tiara.
Fine.
At party, one cupcake fell.
She froze.
I saw.
Then her friend stepped on it accidentally.
Everyone laughed.
Lily laughed too after second.
Small victory.
Daniel cried in kitchen.
I told him:
“Don’t make her laughter about you.”
May you like
He nodded.
Always learning.
