Chapter 7 - Linda’s Choice
Mom requested a supervised visit after one week.
I said no.
Then after two.
No.
Then she sent a letter through Maya.
I almost tore it.
Julia said:
“You can throw it away without reading.”
I read.
Emma,
I know you think I chose Thomas over you.
I stopped.
Think.
Then:
I was afraid of him too.
I nearly threw it away.
Then kept reading.
Thomas controlled money. He controlled the house. He made me believe if he left, we would lose everything.
Partly true.
Then:
When your father died, I was alone and terrified.
I met Thomas a year later.
At first he made everything easier.
He paid bills.
Fixed things.
Took me to dinner.
Helped with you.
Then:
The first time he hit you, I told him if it ever happened again, I would leave.
I did not know that.
I was ten.
What happened?
Thomas slapped me because I spilled orange juice on his laptop bag.
Mom screamed at him.
He apologized.
Bought me a stuffed bear.
Then:
It happened again.
Mom wrote:
Every time I moved the line.
That sentence was honest.
Then:
I told myself I was protecting you from losing another father.
I cried.
Not because it excused.
Because I remembered wanting Thomas to call me daughter once.
He never did.
Then the letter shifted.
I signed trust forms because Thomas told me they were reimbursements for things he paid.
I did not understand all the companies.
I stopped.
That was not fully true.
Recordings later showed she knew at least some.
Then:
I should have checked.
Too small.
Then:
At the hospital, I was scared Thomas would go to prison and we would lose the house.
There.
Still money.
Then:
I love you more than anything.
I whispered:
“No.”
Julia sat across room.
“What?”
“You don’t do that to someone you love more than anything.”
She did not correct.
Then court.
Mom had not been charged yet, but investigation targeted:
Child endangerment.
Obstruction.
False statements to CPS.
Trust fraud.
Maybe assault? She grabbed wrist in hospital but minor.
Then police found recordings where she did more.
Not hit me.
But hold door while Thomas hurt me?
One file when I was sixteen.
Thomas dragged me into laundry room because I came home late.
I tried to leave.
Mom stood at doorway.
I screamed:
“Move!”
She said:
“Just listen to him.”
Thomas slapped me twice.
Mom did not move.
That was participation in confinement.
Another:
Thomas choking me.
Mom:
“Thomas, let go. You’re leaving marks.”
Not:
You could kill her.
Leaving marks.
She worried evidence.
Then one after:
Mom applying makeup.
“People are going to ask.”
Me:
“Maybe they should.”
Mom:
“Do you want him arrested?”
Me:
“Yes.”
Silence.
Then:
“You don’t mean that.”
I did.
I had told her.
That recording destroyed the story that she did not know what I wanted.
Then trust.
A file from six months earlier.
Thomas:
“Sterling is asking for invoices again.”
Mom:
“Then stop using Pathway.”
Thomas:
“We need that money.”
Mom:
“It’s Emma’s.”
Thomas:
“She lives here.”
Mom:
“I know.”
Then:
“If she sees statements at eighteen, we’re screwed.”
Mom answered:
“Then we need to explain before she sees them.”
Not stop.
Explain.
Then Thomas:
“She doesn’t get to accuse us after everything we spent raising her.”
Mom:
“I know.”
I listened once.
Never again.
Maya asked after:
“Do you still want no contact?”
“Yes.”
Then my birthday approached.
Eighteen.
Everyone assumed I would celebrate.
I dreaded.
Because Thomas had turned the date into a countdown.
Rachel from Sterling said:
“Nothing dramatic happens at midnight.”
Good.
Julia asked what I wanted.
“Pizza.”
“Cake?”
“No.”
“Anything?”
“New headphones.”
Done.
Then two days before birthday, prosecutors charged Mom.
Not because of birthday.
Investigation matured.
She surrendered through attorney.
Charges initially included:
Child endangerment.
Obstruction related to prior CPS investigation.
Fraud connected to trust reimbursements.
Conspiracy with Thomas on certain financial transactions.
She was released under conditions.
No contact with me unless authorized.
Thomas remained jailed pending trial because of violence, witness intimidation and risk.
Then Mom’s attorney contacted Maya.
Linda wanted to change plea posture.
Cooperate.
Not because suddenly good.
Evidence was strong.
Still, cooperation might reveal more.
I hated that.
It felt like she might get rewarded for telling truth only after trapped.
Julia said:
May you like
“Cooperation is not courage. It can still be useful.”
I wrote that down.
