Chapter 17 - My Own Will
My personal estate was not $170 million.
Good.
Cottage sale proceeds.
Investments.
Savings.
Personal possessions.
About $3.8 million net by then.
Enough to matter.
Not enough to distort continents.
I had full control.
I could leave Allison everything.
Or charity.
Or neighbors.
Or burn? Not literally.
I asked Rachel Avery:
“What would be clean?”
She refused to decide.
“Your values.”
Fine.
I wrote:
$1.5 million to Allison outright.
Why outright if trust already huge protected future?
Because this was mine.
No need cage every dollar.
$500,000 to regional library system.
$500,000 to pulmonary rehabilitation access fund.
$300,000 divided among longtime caregivers, staff, and friends by specific bequests.
Remaining residue to the Henry and Margaret Collins Community Foundation.
Personal jewelry and family photos to Allison.
Henry’s letters:
Allison.
No condition.
No:
If she visits.
No:
If she divorces.
No:
If she behaves.
Then executor:
Professional.
Not Allison.
She laughed when told.
“Still not trusting?”
“Still liking you.”
Then healthcare agent:
Allison.
She had earned that relationship.
Then one issue:
My old Asheville house no longer mine.
Good.
Unit 14B no longer trust.
Good.
No hidden property.
Then Allison asked:
“Why $1.5 million if I’ll eventually have trust?”
“Because I want to.”
“Could foundation use?”
“Yes.”
“Then—”
“Don’t optimize my affection.”
She stopped.
Then smiled.
“Okay.”
Good.
Then foundation board succession.
Allison could remain one seat for five years after my death, then reappointment by independent board.
No permanent family chair.
No dynasty.
Her beneficial trust:
Independent corporate trustee.
Distributions under standards.
Investment diversification.
No spouse control.
No assignment.
At Allison’s death, remaining assets? Original terms perhaps 50% to her descendants if any, else foundation. She had no children. Stepchild Michael's son not descendant. Could define original trust says if no descendants, remainder to foundation. Since she has no children. Then ultimately foundation gets. Fine.
But user hasn't said no children. We can establish she never had children. Why? Just life. She remained childless by choice/circumstance. No need issue.
Then Derek:
No interest ever.
Divorce ended spouse status.
Even if still married, spendthrift likely. But irrelevant.
Then legal archive.
Derek restitution complete.
Granite Peak satisfied.
Northbridge vendor claim satisfied.
CSD bankruptcy closed.
Allison guarantee resolved.
Divorce final.
Assault case complete.
Fraud case complete.
No open civil suit.
Capacity challenge rejected and closed.
No title dispute.
Good.
Then at ninety three, I caught pneumonia again.
Less severe initially.
Hospital.
Allison came.
I saw fear.
“Don’t move me to your house.”
She laughed through tears.
“I know.”
“Good.”
I recovered partially.
Then needed oxygen at home for months.
The floral apron? Gone.
Derek words no longer loud.
One evening Allison cooked risotto.
At my senior apartment kitchen.
She spilled a spoonful.
We both froze.
Then she said:
“Don’t.”
I laughed.
She laughed.
No trauma speech.
Then she said:
“Mom, I still think about not getting up.”
“You mean kitchen.”
“Yes.”
“I know.”
“I hate myself.”
“Stop.”
“I watched.”
“Yes.”
“Why don’t you hate?”
“Sometimes I did.”
She cried.
“Then?”
“You changed.”
She looked.
“Is that enough?”
“For relationship, yes.”
“For what I did?”
“There is no universal scale.”
Then:
“You faced consequences.”
She paid debt.
Lost marriage.
Admitted falsehoods.
Cooperated.
Rebuilt trust.
Not prison.
Because prosecutors decided evidence and circumstances did not justify charges.
No need invent equal punishment.
Then I said:
“Do not spend rest of life trying to make one frozen minute disappear. Let it stay. Just don’t repeat it.”
She nodded.
That night, she stayed because I asked.
Not because she owed.
Then I received notice:
Derek had completed supervised release years earlier and remained compliant; no relevance. Why would notice now? No need.
Instead, perhaps a final foundation audit found old CSD payment? Need no twist this late. Keep.
Then at ninety four, Henry’s trust passed $180m? Market. We don't need.
I had one final trust meeting.
Asked:
“What happens if I die tomorrow?”
Rachel explained.
No surprises.
That was what I wanted.
Then I signed minutes.
My own signature.
Not forged.
Not copied.
Not challenged.
I laughed.
Rachel asked:
“What?”
“Nothing.”
But it was not nothing.
For years Derek had tried to make other people’s signatures into doors.
At ninety four, mine simply meant:
I understood.
I agreed.
I chose.
May you like
Then my health worsened again.
And for the first time since Henry died, I felt ready to let someone else handle what came after.
